Vanessa’s Blog

Tim and I were going through jobn listings for him, looking at what’s available or what will be available to him after he graduates in December.

Most of the jobs he’s interested in are in the Southeastern United States, mostly because that’s his concentration.

This is unfortunate, mostly because even North Carolina is further south than I ever expected I’d live, mostly because of the weather. 100 percent humidity? Ick. More than 85* weather? Yucky. No winter? BOO.

Shockingly, as a Canadian (and someone who spent a decade in New Jersey), I like cold weather. I like having distinction between the seasons. I like the first warm day in spring, when the sun’s a bit warmer and you can put away the bulky winter jacket. I like leaves that change colour because of the season, not because of drought. I really like snow.

After talking about this (as we have many, many, MANY times before), Tim said we’re having a bit of a “Green Acres” dilemma. I guess that’s kind of true, except instead of city and country, it’s North (or further North) versus South (or further South).

Location — and whose job/ career takes precedence — these are pretty weighty issues that need to be worked out. I can easily see how they could lead to resentment if one person constantly got what they wanted, while the other person had to live in a place they hated and work in a job that was subpar. One of the many things we’ll have to figure out, like plenty of other married couples before us.

But, like I told Tim, what Oliver Douglas (Eddie Albert) tells Lisa Douglas (Eva Gabor) in the theme song is NOT going to work on me. (See if you can find what I’m talking about. Hint: He yanks her into Green Acres after he says it.)

And, for your viewing pleasure, the opening theme to “Green Acres”:

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On the iPod:

Metric: Succexy
Robert Plant & Allison Kraus: Nothin’
Tom Petty: This Old Town
Damien Rice: Volcano
Elvis Costello: Beyond Belief

Saw this on CNN the other day.

Basically, there are a few couples in the article saying sleeping alone is beneficial for their marriage, that it makes them feel closer, that absence makes the heart grow fonder, etc.

Then, in comes the pysch people, saying sleeping alone when married does the opposite.

So, who is right?

For Tim and I, sleeping together is a no-brainer. It feels more comfortable, kind of like coming home. Sure, sometimes he twitches and grinds his teeth and sometimes I toss and turn, but those are minor in comparison with the — to me — crazy decision to sleep alone.

Quite frankly, we got enough “alone sleepy time” when he was in the hospital, thankyouverymuch.

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On the iPod
(OK, I haven’t charged my iPod, but here’s what I was listening to on iTunes before I came to work)

Jay Clifford: Know When To Walk Away
Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers: Won’t Back Down
Ingrid Michaelson: The Way I Am
Circa Survive: The Great Golden Baby
Juliana Theory: If I Told You This Was Killing Me Would You Stop?

I apologize for the lack of posts over the past few days, but Tim and I have been out of town for a funeral.

It’s the first time since we got married that we’ve had to deal with the death of a loved one, though I know it won’t be the last. I think it was important to our family that we were there.  Even though sometimes it’s not possible to attend a family member’s funeral, it always helps, in my experience.

I’ve been fairly lucky in that I haven’t lossed any near family members and I got to spend time with my great-grandma, arrière grand-maman, my great Auntie Eve and my great Uncle Ron. I’ve been unlucky to have lost my high school principal and a good friend when he was a senior. Going to those funerals offered closure and I was able to give and receive support from friends and family.

In this case, we definitely got that.  I was told — and I’m sure he was too — many times that family appreciated us being there.  I was glad to be there too, and I’m sure it meant a lot to my husband.

It was a lovely funeral, a lovely wake and though there were tears, it was more a celebration of Maude’s life and the tough, sweet, classy, stylish woman she was.  We went through old photos, told storise and just remembered a great lady.

To paraphrase the priest at her funeral, she’s up in Heaven, where she’s been reunited with people who love her.